Thursday, August 10, 2006
Didn't do anything much today. Yet, it caused me to think alot about my recent attitudes and my spiritual walk.
My unhappiness from last night did not go away in the morning. There was a plan for an outing to Sentosa today. When my mom mentioned it to my dad, the answer was a flat NO. That part, I was a little sour about. The next part was what hit the top:
"Everyday go out still not enough arh?"
I spent the rest of the evening at Sherman's house with a cold and heavy attitude. I didn't care if I was rude to the adults or anyone else. Somehow, my actions were subtle enough for them not to detect anything much from me.
The next day would be better..
Woke up with the same bitter feeling from yesterday. It's one of those feelings where you wish you could just sleep the whole day and not do anything. When the venue was changed to East Coast Park, I plucked up the courage to ask my mom if I could go.
"No. We're having lunch with your father."
My heart sank. That's it, no more outing.
Dad came and took us to a Japanese restaurant. My mood did lift a little. That's when I realised why dad wouldn't let me go. He had this planning this family lunch a long time and couldn't have it previously because of his busy schedule. That was when all bitter feelings dispersed and I was left on the verge of breaking down in tears.
How could I have thought all those bad thoughts? How could I have been so blind?
Even though I didn't go out after that, I thanked God for this day. Thank God for showing me that there is usually a better plan if I just wait and see. Many times, the flesh just wants to have things the way they want, usually ending up choosing the way that would leave us at a disadvantage. This lesson is one I have learned many times. Today however, is when I do my practical test..
posted at 10:02 PM
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